too much in my head.

We've had a good bit of snow and ice these past few days here in Atlanta, which means I haven't been to work and I've basically been a shut in for almost three days.  I am not complaining because it has been great to not have to work and relax for a while, but I have been suffering from cabin fever.  Not that I am used to going out and doing a bunch of things in my free time, but not being able to made me want to just drive around and get out of my teeny apartment.  I love living in this city, but we all realize I can be quite the home body.  I don't mean to, but it is truly weird to be in a big, busy place and feel completely alone.  Before you start thinking I am ridiculously pathetic, don't.  Since I've been stuck in the house due to the weather, I've been pondering more than usual. 

I hate feeling this way and having literally no friends other than my co-workers.  And while I admit that I adore the people I work with, they aren't exactly people I would do things with socially.  I miss my friends and all my fabulous sorority sisters, and I think it is finally starting to get to me.  I try to stay busy with work which shouldn't be hard, but I want more out of my life here in ATL.  One of the biggest drawbacks to working in retail is the weird hours and different schedule every week.  I think I am too much of a planner to do this forever, I like routine and yes I realize how lame that is to say.

I hope one of these days I can finally get out of my head and stop feeling unsatisfied with my personal life.  All of this is so foreign to me because the last four years I have been surrounded by more people than I knew what to do with, and now the exact opposite is happening.  It makes me wonder...how did I get here?  How did I get to this place when I thought this was what I wanted?  I thought I wanted a fresh start and part of me is glad to have had just that but the other fraction of myself is crying inside. 

I know all of this will change when I move out of the apartment and into the townhouse in a few months, so I am trying to be patient.  Once we close on the property next month I know I will stay busy with cleaning it up and painting everything, but until then I am just going to have to man up and manage.

In the words of sweet Taylor Swift whom I can not stand, "you're tied together with a smile, but you're coming undone."